Ask, Align, Receive: The Manifesting Fix with Kelsey Aida | Aligned & Abundant Ep. 65

Years ago I bought a little wooden sign that said ask, believe, receive. I hung it up, I said the affirmations, I did everything The Secret told me to do — and I was still sitting in a hard financial season wondering what was wrong with me. Turns out nothing was wrong with me. There was just a whole step missing.

Kelsey Aida is a best-selling author, energetic alignment coach, and co-host of the top 1% podcast High Vibin' It. Her upcoming book, The Manifesting Fix (December 2026, available for presale now), reveals why traditional manifestation advice keeps falling flat — and what to do instead. Her answer is beautifully simple: ask, align, receive. And the thing standing between you and everything you want? Resistance. Usually the kind hiding where you can't see it yet.

What you'll hear in this episode:

• Why "ask and receive" leaves out the most important part of manifesting — and what Kelsey puts in the middle instead
• How a career-ending ballet injury led to a three-year depression, and the exact moment under a tree that birthed her entire body of work
• The one question that surfaces your hidden resistance in about 90 seconds (grab a journal for this one)
• Why alignment does not always feel good — and how the spiritual community got this one wrong
• The affirmation shift that stops you from lying to your own nervous system ("I'm a millionaire" vs. what actually works)
• Why different kinds of resistance need different antidotes — worthiness wounds, money blocks, and impatience are not the same problem
• Kelsey's conversation with her own anxiety, and what it told her about why it never leaves
• Quantum leaps, bamboo roots, and permission to grow on your own timeline
• Why withholding your desires from the world might be the actual selfish choice

Here's what stayed with me after we stopped recording: this life is not a race, and your roots are doing more than you think they are. Whether you're deep in the messy middle or just now getting honest about what you actually want, you don't need to be ready. You need to start. Come back to yourself, get curious about the resistance, and let the timing be divine.

Transcript

Kelsey: That's a great question because I think the old me would've said, "Oh, when you're in alignment, you're going to feel good." But alignment doesn't always feel good. It can feel like going through your dark night of the soul moment.

Christine: Welcome back, beautiful souls, to Aligned and Abundant. I'm your host, Christine, and today I have the absolute pleasure of sitting down with Kelsey Aida, best-selling author, energetic alignment coach, intuitive, and co-host of the top 1% podcast, High Vibin' It, with over 550,000 downloads. She helps soul-centered women radically love themselves, align their energy, and manifest the life they know they're meant for, without the unnecessary struggle and delay. Her upcoming book, The Manifesting Fix, is going to be released this year in December of 2026, and it reveals why traditional manifestation advice fails and what to do instead. Kelsey, welcome to the show. I'm so happy that you're here.

Kelsey: Yeah, thanks, Christine. I'm excited to be here.

Christine: It has to be destiny that our paths have come across one another, because you have a Substack called Aligned and Abundant, and obviously this podcast is called Aligned and Abundant. And it's funny because when I was naming this podcast, I did see that this happened to be like a popular combo of words, but I said, "You know what? We are each our own individuals, and it's not about the name or the product, but it's about the story and the person behind the story. It's the magnetism of our individual energy." So I would love to get to know you a little bit. I'm sure my audience would love to hear a little bit about your story, about how you developed this desire to spread the knowledge about manifestation and spirituality in general.

Kelsey: Yeah, well, first of all, thanks for having me. The Aligned and Abundant Club is a fun one. Obviously, I write essays and journals about it, like every week on my Substack, because I believe that even though it's crazy times and everything's falling apart, yada yada, you still have the right to live your best life, to create your heaven on earth, and alignment just makes life so much easier. And I feel like it's everyone's God-given right to live a life of abundance, whether that's financial abundance, an abundance of love, an abundance of safety, an abundance of community. Whatever it is that you want, I'm here to support you to get it. Anyone who's new to my world—I've been writing books on this for almost ten years now. The Manifesting Fix that you mentioned that's coming out later this year, that's now available for presale, so I know I'll link to that in the show notes and all that for people. But it's really my mission to help people align with their goals in a deep, clear, profound way, because we've been told, "Just ask and then receive. Like, just pray about it and it'll happen." And it's like, yes, and in between the asking and the receiving is the journey to become the person who can have that. It's the journey to truly align with that version of your life.

So I love alignment. I'm excited about it because my story starts, of course, when I was desperately unaligned. I found myself in a deep suicidal—I mean, to put it not lightly—suicidal depression. And why I got into that in the first place was because I was training my whole life to be a ballerina. I got injured. I couldn't go to college for that. I couldn't go to the auditions to join a company. I was like, "What is my life? What is my identity? That's literally the only thing I'm good at." So I spiraled into a depression, and I was stuck there for about three years. Towards the end, I had this epiphany of, "You know what? I used to be a happy person. I used to be bubbly. I used to like my life. I used to be passionate. I used to have energy. I am sick and tired of being sick and tired. God, spirit team, whoever's out there, send help, send resources. Like, I'm willing. I will do it. Like, whatever you send, I'll do it."

So of course, in the spirit of asking and receiving, I started working with a great shaman. I started working with a therapist. I was reading all the books, listening to all the podcasts, and just absorbing all the spiritual, energetic knowledge of energy and quantum physics, and just being empowered in your mind, mindset, affirmations—all the tools. And I was able to get better. I was able to get better within about maybe a month or two's time, heal from the depression, and on the other side, feel even better than I had felt before.

And I was sitting under a tree meditating, like very monk-like one day, and I was having this realization or this calling that I needed to write about what I had learned and what was working for me. And I just had this desire birth of like—I'm going to be the next Deepak Chopra. I'm going to write fifty million books. I'm going to teach everyone everything that's been working for me. And maybe that's a tasteless example now because of Epstein files, so maybe not that. I know, right? But you get the idea. Like, I'm going to be an author. I'm going to write this. And in my mind, I felt like books are a good way to reach the masses. It's a very affordable way to learn intimate knowledge, you know, and absorb.

So that's kind of what started it all. Fast-forward ten years later, we've got the High Vibin' It Podcast. I've hosted international self-love retreats. I've written a bunch of books. The Manifesting Fix is my favorite one. I'm so excited for it to come out because it's going to help everyone get unstuck. And yeah, I'm just here to, like, bring the flavor to the manifesting space of we can make this easier, we can make it more practical. Let's focus on alignment, and let's release our resistance, and then anything's possible.

Christine: It's so funny that you mentioned ask and receive, because I think I can go back to when I first became interested in manifesting, and it was of course with The Secret, and it kind of made it seem so easy. And I remember being in a hard situation financially, and I was like, "Oh my gosh, why isn't this working?" And I even bought, like, these little wooden signs that said, "Ask, Believe, Receive." And now years later, I'm like, there's so much more to this. And it also doesn't have to be as complicated as some people make it out to be. Like, I've been with plenty of coaches where it's like, "Write this ten thousand times, and really feel into it." And it's like, I don't know if that's going to work, you know what I mean? Yeah. Like, it's all trial and error. Everyone's on their own journey to self-discovery. And I really appreciate that you shared a little bit of your story, because I can feel the tenderness around that. That had to have been pretty crushing for you to realize that you were working towards something, and then it was taken away from you by no means of your own. And I think that what I'm learning as I'm getting older and talking to more people is when we share our stories, so many people that are in the spiritual world that are sharing their gifts and their knowledge and their insights and coming back to their authentic selves—like, we all have a story, and it's usually like we're at rock bottom, we are depressed, and we know eventually that we are going to be the ones to pick ourselves back up. And then we do. And then it's like this unlock of amazing spiritual gifts and the right connections.

And again, like, I love that I wrote down that you said a desire birth. I've never heard that, and I love that. So tell me a little bit about, like, bring me to the image where you're sitting under this tree and you have this idea that you want to write a book. Bring me back into that moment, because I want to hear a little bit about—I feel like so many people, and myself included, I get these downloads and these ideas, but sometimes I don't always act on them. So tell me a little bit about how and why you decided to actually act on this one in particular, and then look at all it's brought you.

Kelsey: Yeah, so in that moment, what I can remember is feeling extreme peace, and then from that peace was like extreme clarity. It was like a light bulb—ding—you should write a bunch of books. And I was like, "Okay, I've never written a book, but whatever." And it's funny because looking back on my life, in first grade and kindergarten I had the same teacher, Miss Kelly, and she would laminate these books that I would write. So I was writing books even when I was little.

But like, growing up I wouldn't say, "Oh yeah, I was super excited to study English. I loved school." Like, no. I was not into writing because I wasn't writing about something that mattered to me, right? So if you're writing a history essay, like, ew, you know? So I didn't really consider myself a writer, but I was like, "I need to be an author. I need to spread the medicine to millions. This seems like a good medium. We're doing it." And like, I'm just someone that when I have an idea that feels super aligned, I will probably act on it pretty quickly.

What happened from there was I didn't want no one to read my first book, so I was like, "Okay, I'm not just going to write a book because I don't have a platform, so let me start blogging." And that's really, like, the early stages of my Aligned and Abundant Substack column was on my website, kelseyaida.com, and I was writing about anxiety and depression and affirmations and how to do them in an authentic way and what actually works and what doesn't work and what helped me and what didn't help me.

And then I built, like, a little bit of an email list, and I had enough courage to, like, self-publish the first book. So my first book was, like, this affirmation bible. And in similar style to The Manifesting Fix, it was like what they aren't teaching you about affirmations—like, why they don't work for you. And the whole premise being, like, it needs to feel authentic and expansive. Like, lying to yourself is not going to be helpful.

So instead of, you know, "I'm a millionaire," it's like, "I'm excited to become the first millionaire in my family" or "I'm getting better with money every year" or, you know, "I'm becoming more financially savvy" or "I'm learning how to multiply my money into millions." Or, you know, it's like shifting and shaping it and customizing it so that it is true. No one's to say that that's not true, but also it feels expansive and good and not shutting you down and making you feel dumb for lying to yourself, or making you feel bad that you're not a millionaire when you're, like, saying you're a millionaire but you're not.

So that first book kind of sparked my authorhood journey, and from there I just stayed consistent. Like, I've literally been putting out content probably almost every week—the better part of every week—for over a decade. So that's how I've slowly, slowly built somewhat of a community around these messages that I teach of like you can live your best life. I encourage you to love yourself through the process. It's a journey of becoming, and let me help you make it easier.

Christine: I love the fact that you said, "I'm not a millionaire, but I am working on becoming" or, like, the way that you word it has to feel good for your nervous system. It has to be believable for your nervous system. So I feel like the more that people are learning and growing and finding these different modalities and mediums such as Substack, writing a book, and getting our words out there, the more that we are growing and evolutionalizing the path.

And I think for me, because I am an English teacher, you know, I was in a former life, right? So I do like writing and reading. I do like reading. And one thing that I love about a book is you can pick it up and put it down when you're in the moment. So I'm the type of person who I will pick it up, and it's so funny—sometimes I'll have books that have been sitting on my shelf for a while, but it's like you pick it up at the right time, when you're meant to. Like, I've had The Artist Way for, like, years, and then just randomly I picked it up and then I started utilizing it.

So it's just funny that I think sometimes—well, you have to trust in divine timing, right? So I think the perfect time is the time that you actually pick it up or the time that you actually write the book, say the thing, get it out there. And I love that you were originally self-published, and now you are supported, right?

Kelsey: The last four books after the self-published book have been published with big publishers.

Christine: Yeah, that's amazing. So when did you start your podcast? Tell me a little bit about your podcast. So you wrote your book, and then when did the podcast come into play?

Kelsey: Yeah, so the podcast was kind of on my manifestation to-do list of, like, things I wanted to have or create one day. But it didn't happen until a friend of mine had the opportunity to have a show on an online radio network. It actually started as a live show. But she's shy. She's like a hermit. She was like, "Ew, it sounds like my worst nightmare. I don't want to have my own show." She's a hypnotherapist. And so she called me up, and she was like, "Well, the only way I'm going to do this is if you want to be my co-host." And I was like, "Girl, this is my podcast I've been manifesting."

So it kind of just landed that way. And for a while we did it with the network. It was expensive for us to have them produce it, so then eventually we just started producing it ourselves, and that's been going for, I think, over... We're almost at three hundred episodes. Amazing. So almost every week. There was, like, a year where we did every other week because it was just not sustainable to put out that much content.

Yeah, I get it. But yeah, podcasting, I love it, as you know. It's fun. You get to meet people. It's super intimate. You can be, like, in people's earbuds when they're cleaning the bathroom or on their way to work or on a walk with their dog or... I just think it's such a cool platform. So also spreading the medicine that way, of course.

Christine: One hundred percent. And I think that some of my best car rides are when I have a really good podcast in my ear along the way. And it's almost like you develop a friendship. Like, you develop a knowing of the person that's on the other side. You hear everything that they're saying, and you hear their trials and their becomings, and you see the growth. And so that's also really cool to witness. Like, you have, like, this intimate conversation without having the conversation, you know what I mean?

Mm-hmm. And that's really beautiful. And then also, like, if you're having a crappy day and you are able to hear, as you call, the medicine—like, it just reignites, like, that spark within you and kind of makes you feel better. Like, that was my story with my caseload. And I feel like sometimes when you're listening to a podcast, someone can just say that one right phrase or word—something that you already know in a different way—and it clicks and unlocks in your brain and your nervous system in a way that it never has before. And then you can actually integrate it.

One hundred percent. And it's just from hearing the words, and then you're forever different.

Christine: Yes, yes. It's almost like you can't go back. Yeah. Your consciousness changes. Your identity shifts, and then you're this new person and this new avenue of thoughts and connections. So tell me a little bit about your manifestation stories or techniques. Like, I'd love to hear how maybe, like, a little preview into your book, The Manifesting Fix, and what have you come to realize or figure out? Like, any little insider scoops that you want to share with the audience while they can go and pre-order your book?

Kelsey: Yeah, so the biggest thing I've realized, which is basically the thesis of the book, over all my years of working with people, having my own manifestations, trial and error, is that there's really only one thing standing between you and everything you want, and that is some form of personal resistance. So this could look like you're resisting your present moment, which is why you're trying to frantically manifest a whole new life, or you're resisting your emotions, and that's keeping your emotional body stuck, and now you're not open to receive. Or, you know, you're resisting more money even though you say you want more money because you're like, "Oh, rich people are bad. I don't want to be bad, so I don't want to be rich," right?

So all this stuff is happening usually subconsciously or in your body, your emotional body, your astral body. Like, things can get a little stuck, a little blocked, a little bit like conflicting interests. So for example, if you want to manifest more love, but a part of you—an aspect—is still super unwell from the last situationship, you're like, "Okay, we're not doing that." So consciously, you're like, "Of course I want love. I'm ready for my soulmate. Where are you? Show up." But then subconsciously, there's different aspects of you that are like, "Hell nah, we don't want love again. That was a train wreck," you know?

So it's like this push/pull energy inside of you is causing you to, A, not broadcast a clear signal to your life and the universe of what you actually want, but B, it's stopping you from moving towards the goal and co-creating it because there's usually just fear or a stuck point or blockage there. So as a Reiki practitioner, you know a lot about blockages and when energy's not moving the right way. So that's one form, right? But then there's just so many different ways it shows up, which is why now in The Manifesting Fix, I'm explaining to everyone, look, if you can find your resistance and you can work through it, on the other side of that, you actually come into alignment with your goals, and then they can manifest more easily, and then they can manifest quickly, and then they can manifest more effortlessly.

But we've been sold the more sexy, oversimplified version of all you have to do is ask and then you'll receive. And it's like, my version of manifesting is ask, align, then receive. And in order to align with your goals, we usually need to find and troubleshoot the resistance. Does that make sense?

Christine: That makes so much sense, and as you were saying that, I'm like, "Okay, this is the next secret, and you should write a book," but you did. And so I'm waiting for it to get into my hands because this is exactly what we need. And by we, I mean the conscious collective. And I know you know that.

Yeah. We're just like this is the next level, basically. Oh yeah. Because we already, like, dipped our toes in conscious creation. We like the idea of it. Sometimes it's working, sometimes it's not working. So now it's like manifesting 2.0. Okay, we need to learn about resistance and alignment. That's the next phase, and then everything will be easier.

Christine: What advice would you give to the listener who doesn't realize that they're stuck?

Kelsey: I feel like a lot of people realize that they're stuck because they're frustrated that they're stuck. I was going to say, if someone doesn't realize that they're stuck, then I feel happy for them because they're just, like, in their happy little non-frustrated bubble.

Christine: Right. I think that some of the things I'm learning about my own human design—so it's funny that you brought up frustration because my signal is frustration. So if I'm frustrated with a situation or a person or a relationship, like I know that it's not in alignment.

Kelsey: Yeah. What's your design, by the way?

Christine: I'm a generator.

Kelsey: Okay. I'm a manifesting generator, so I think mine's the same. Yeah. I think that frustration is a pretty common signal.

Christine: Well, I'm a three five. How about yourself?

Kelsey: Five one. Okay, so we both got that five one.

Christine: Five five. I just feel like sometimes... And that's great, like you just said. If someone is not even recognizing that there are limiting beliefs or subconscious thoughts or programs running in the background, like, that's fine. I don't think that everyone is here to evolve at the same rate or the same level, so I do love personally when I connect with souls like you who are on, like, the same wavelength. It's almost like, um, a lighthouse where the light goes out and it's like whoever is in alignment, come on board.

Yeah. Um, so I want to ask you a little bit of, like, what for you tells you that you are living in alignment? And how can we make this easier for listeners to understand? Like, if I were to just broadly say, "Hey, Kelsey, what is alignment? What does that mean to you?" Because I have no clue. I don't understand it.

Kelsey: Yeah, that's a great question because I think the old me would've said, "Oh, when you're in alignment, you're going to feel good." But alignment doesn't always feel good. It can feel like doing the hard thing, having the hard conversation, breaking up with the toxic person. Like, it's not always easy, and I think that's another thing that's been oversimplified in the spiritual community—that aligned is easy or aligned is positive all the time. And for me, alignment just means, like, you're facing towards your goals, and you're, like, on the path.

Which from that definition, you can't really not be in alignment. But from a more psychological perspective, I like to look at it as a spectrum of, like, resistance on one side, alignment on the other. The more resistance you have in any given moment, the less aligned you are to that desire in that moment, right? But the more you can get rid of that resistance, untangle it, work through it, you naturally come into a state of more harmony, more alignment with your goals. So to demonstrate that with an example, like, being in alignment with my, you know, writing and publishing this book looks like showing up to write it, pitching it to agents, pitching it to publishers, not taking rejection personally, showing up on social media, like, doing the stuff.

And then when I had those limiting beliefs come up of, like, will this sell? Is the writing good enough? Are people going to get it? Is this going to work? I would have to talk myself off the cliff and be like, "Yes, there's a reason why this book took ten years to come to fruition. Like, the people weren't ready, but now they are," you know? Like, I had to tell myself, like, the truth and come back to that in order to, like, recalibrate towards the goal.

So for me, it's kind of like a spectrum of resistance to alignment. From a zoomed-out perspective, I don't think you can ever not be aligned with your highest timeline or your best goal, because the detours just give you more character and bring you back usually in a stronger way to the path. But on a more zoomed-in level, yes, we can get stuck in resistance. We can get a little blocked, and it's important to see where that is, and then we can feel aligned again.

To go back to your other question, for people who don't know, like, if they're blocked, one of my favorite questions to ask to find a piece of resistance inside of you is to look at the thing that you want. So let's say you want your dream house or a raise or the beautiful relationship or more friends or move across the country or whatever it is. Think of your goal, and then ask yourself, "Is there any part of me that's not on board with what I think I want?" And then you just shut up, and you listen, and you journal if you like journaling. And you write down all the objections that come up, and then you'll be like, "Oh, there's my resistance that's been hiding in the shadows." And then you can actually do something about it.

Christine: Yeah, I was going to ask, what do you do? So you recognize, and then you're surprised. You're like, "Oh, dang, I have a whole page here of resistance." What do you recommend to work through those things?

Kelsey: Yeah, so I like to take each piece of resistance one by one, and first start by questioning. Usually, they're like beliefs, narratives, or stories, right? So I like to question it and be like, "Is this even mine?" Yeah, first of all, because a lot of it's programming or bestowed to us from our parents or teachers or caregivers or sisters or whoever. So if it's not yours, you can be like, "Okay, that's not mine. I don't choose to hold that anymore." I like to cross it off or burn it or throw it away, whatever—symbolic of, like, you bring it to attention and you realize you don't want to carry it, and you can let it go.

That's best case scenario, obviously. Yeah. But sometimes it's not always that simple, which is why I had to write The Manifesting Fix, because different kinds of resistance require different kinds of antidotes. So for example, if you have, like, a worthiness wound and your resistance is, "Well, who am I to ask for all this money?" or "I don't feel worthy of the relationship," like, then you need to get on the self-love train. There's a whole protocol for that, right? Or if you are, let's say, resisting money, like, there's a whole process I have for working through some of those limiting beliefs and questioning them and rewriting them and making them better and more empowered. Or, you know, if your blockage is, like, an impatience thing and you're judging yourself or you're judging your life, like, time to practice some more trust. Let's explain why things take time. It's not bad for things to take time, right?

So that's really what prompted the book, because there's not, like, a one-exercise-fits-all to get rid of all types of resistance. It's like based on the resistance that you find, here's the protocol that you can do to get rid of it, untangle it, transmute it into alignment.

Christine: That makes so much sense, and I recognize that it is going to take work, right? I think that's what life's all about—is when we recognize these subconscious patterns and, like you said, that are just sometimes gifted to us, right, handed down to us from our parents or our environment, then we need to take that awareness and we need to do something with it. And I do believe that with action comes clarity, even if it's messy action, even if it is laying it all out on paper, like you mentioned.

I literally was just talking to my friend this morning about that—like, that I have some, like, feelings, and it's towards, you know, a particular person. And I'm just going to write them all out, and then I'm going to just energetically let it go by releasing it to fire. And I just think that when we sit and get quiet with ourselves, we can get the answers. We can uncover the limiting beliefs that are holding us back.

And that's the thing, though. What I'm discovering is the more that you peel back that onion, there's more. There's always more, right? This life is going to be so filled and fulfilling, right? We can rise from the ashes and become that phoenix rising, but first we have to get down and dirty. You have to figure out the why behind the choices that we make, the reasons why we're holding ourselves back. So it's what I people refer to as doing the work.

I used to be like, "What is doing the work?" Like, what does that actually mean? Yeah. And now I get it, you know what I mean? But you have to live through it. And I love that you just mentioned that this book for you was ten years in the making, and that, you know, we always talk about divine timing, but at the end of the day, everyone wants everything to happen, like, tomorrow, like yesterday. Yeah. Like, it should've already happened. So it's about also, like, recognizing that these things do take time, and I love how you framed it as, like, they weren't ready yet. Like, the consciousness wasn't ready yet.

Kelsey: Yeah, because that framing—well, and I'm like, I wasn't ready yet because my writing wasn't as good. And I feel like because this book is going to be bigger, I've always had, like, this intuition around it that it's going to kind of, like, maybe be, I don't know, the breakout book or whatever. So with this book, I got the idea for it literally a decade ago when I was on vacation, where I get all my best ideas, right? And I was writing a blog post that was getting so long, and I was like, "Wow, each of these bullet points could easily be a chapter in a book. This should really be a book. Someone should write a book about this. Oh, wait, I should write the book about this."

Oh my God.

And I think it took ten years because I was working on it on and off, but I had to become the person who could channel the knowledge. I had to work with enough people to troubleshoot their stuff. Um, you know, I had to, like, have time to feel into what the people want to know about manifestation and channel the answers for them. And, you know, manifestation ten years ago wasn't as mainstream as it is now, so people hadn't tried it and been frustrated with it yet. Ah. They were, like, just excited about it. But now people have tried it, had some success, some not so much, and now they're like, "Okay, I need to go deeper." And so I feel like it's perfect timing now. I'm like, okay, the people are ready. The book is ready. My writing's ready. The information is ready, and hopefully this is going to help millions of people to align with their goals and stop getting stuck and frustrated.

Christine: Yes, and so it is. It will. Mm-hmm. And I love that you had to go through all of that, because in my mind I'm thinking that's embodiment. You had to live it to feel it. Yeah. And now you can speak so eloquently about it. It just flows right out of you. Like you said, channeling—you're just, it just comes right out of you so naturally and innately, and that's beautiful.

And you know what's funny, too, about the book? When you set out on a mission to write a book about manifestation troubleshooting, do you know what happens to your life? A lot of manifestation troubleshooting opportunities, okay? Speaking of, uh, walking the walk and being initiated. So everything I teach in the book is from a place of I've been there. I'm not preaching. I'm probably oversharing about my own life, my trials and errors. Um, but yeah, I wanted it to be, like, super relatable and funny. Like, it's not a heavy book, even though some of the material could be, like, work, like how you said.

I think personally that, yes, doing the shadow work and the healing work is work, and it can be hard. But I think what's harder is to live a life where you're efforting so much because you're not actually in alignment with your goals, and they can't happen, so you're working ten times as hard. But if you do this little bit of work first, get into your alignment with your goals, then it's ten times easier to actually make it happen. So it's like, which hard would you rather have? A short-term healing hard or a long-term hard of efforting your way to the top and probably not even getting there.

Christine: I couldn't say it better. And speaking of, that actually makes me think about quantum leaping or quantum, you know, jumping, as they say. Yeah. I think that when we speed up our healing, then it allows for more opportunities, more aligned and divine opportunities to come our way, and so that's pretty fun. Have you ever had any experiences with that, or do you feel... Do you have any thoughts on that?

Kelsey: Yeah, my thoughts and experiences. First, I'll start with my thoughts. I like the concept of it, but sometimes it gets so... Like, I feel like we shame ourselves if we're not having quantum leaps. So I want to, like, walk that delicate line of, like, just because it's happening slow and steady doesn't mean it's not a quantum leap, you know? But then it's like they do get bigger and easier. Let's say an easy example is, like, money. So your first phase of money might be, like, learning how to ask for the raise and acquiring more skills so you can make more income. But then, like, stage two is learning how to, like, put that money to work and multiply it, and then, like, a few years down the line, all that work is compounding. You've put a bunch of your money in the stock market, and you might have a huge year, and it, you know, three Xs or whatever. Bitcoin hits twelve million or who knows, right?

So it's like they are quantum leaps, but I feel like there's all this prep work in the making that sometimes gets disqualified. Like, someone could look at this book and be like, "Oh, quantum leap. She wrote this big book." And it's like, yeah, but I've been doing it for a while. Yeah, yeah. So there's that. But then it's like a quantum leap to me could even be you used to always be in toxic relationships, and for the first time you chose a healthy one and you chose yourself, and you didn't self-abandon. So yeah, I'm for any leaps, however slow or fast they happen, because I just want people to live their best life.

Christine: One hundred percent. I think you nailed it. I think that there are so many people out there that... You know what it is? There's so much information, and any one person can take it and go any which way with it. Yeah. But I think at the end of the day, we have to live our life and work through our own uncovering, our own journey, our own everything. I think everyone is here for a reason and a purpose, and it's just a matter of are you willing to go to that inner knowledge within yourself to reconnect to your soul knowledge, to the I am that exists within all of us, and play with that?

And then I love that you, like you just make me feel like you're giving permission to be okay with, like, the timeline. Yeah. Not everyone has to rush everything, and I love that you hit upon that.

Kelsey: Yeah, because if you look at nature, like a plant would have a quantum leap when it transitions from like a seed to a plant, right? So it's like a seed for a while, and then all of a sudden it's a plant. But then it's going to have to grow for a long time before it turns into, like, a tree. Yeah. And then it's going to have to go through winters and summers and seasons, and it's like we forget that we're a part of nature. So, yeah, you're going to have seasons where things are faster or slower or where you're better or where you're less energized or whatever, and that's cool. Yeah. I'm all about, like, if you want to be a true spiritual being, you can't deny the fact that you chose here now to be a human and have a human experience. So if you're denying your human nature, then to me, that's actually not very spiritual, because, hello, your spirit chose to be in a human body, to have a human life.

So are there rules to being a human? Yeah. Are there limitations to it? Of course. But is there also magic, miracles, and alignment? Yeah.

Christine: Yes. That should be a bumper sticker.

Kelsey: Bumper sticker.

Christine: And speaking of, you know what it reminds me of? I moved into this house about six or seven years ago now, and the funny thing is there is bamboo that grows. And I don't know if you're familiar with bamboo at all, but what I learned was bamboo grows its root system underground in secret for six years, and then all of a sudden you have twenty-foot bamboo in your backyard that are an invasive species here in New Jersey. And you're like, "Wow, what am I going to do with that?" Because they are so strong and resilient. Yeah, yeah. And so, take the time. Be the bamboo. Take the time to learn and grow and do the work, but have fun with it along the way also. Like, don't be down and hard on yourself, because it is a journey, like the good and the bad.

And then you'll just sprout up, right? And then when you get that sprout, there's always going to be, like you said, those dark seasons of the soul or those moments or that unexpected obstacle. But all of these things I think make us stronger. And I just like the visualization also of going back to, like, the journey of, like, are you feeling into the resistance? Are you letting the resistance pull you? But always keeping your eye on the prize, always moving forward, always getting clear on what you want. And if you aren't clear on what you want, it's taking that aligned messy action, because you can do all the thinking you want from a parked car, but until you actually put that car in drive, you're going to stay stuck. Yeah. So you have to take some action, and we all have the capability.

Kelsey: Great analogy. I love a good analogy. I know, right? Well, you are an English teacher, so...

Christine: That's true. That's true. Well said.

So you have me thinking. I want to know: What's the sneakiest way you see women blocking their own abundance without realizing it's a self-worth issue underneath? Hmm. And I can speak a little bit for that for myself, because I am working through current money block issues. Like, I had a fear of being successful, so I would, like, self-sabotage. Like, most people get afraid of failure, but I'm afraid of success because I'm like, "Oh, what am I going to do with all of this money?" And, like, you mentioned it a little bit before also with, like, that limiting belief or that subconscious belief of, like, people who have money are evil or they do bad things. So I'm rewiring my brain to work through those things. But then I also came to, maybe there is a self-worth issue underneath there also. So I've been working on personally visibility and safe to be seen. Tell me your thoughts on all of that. I just threw a whole bunch at you, but...

Oh my gosh, yes. I know you can handle it.

Kelsey: So I've struggled with the same because, especially with this book, like I was saying, like, I've had this intuitive ping that it's going to be bigger. Because with my other books, I didn't really have huge expectation. I was like, "Let me write them. Some people will read them, whatever." With this one, I'm like, "Well, what if three million people read about my health journey that I, like, overshare about in the book?" Or, like, what if, you know, this is going to bring more visibility and I have to do more interviews? Or, like, what if, best case scenario, I become like J.K. Rowling, super famous, then people want to follow me around with paparazzi?

Like, paparazzi sounds like my worst nightmare, right? Not that authors really have paparazzi. I know, right? You could. Silly thoughts, silly thoughts like that would, like, come in and, and for me, I have to be like, girl, the destiny is the destiny, and at any level of winning or success, there's going to be contrast. So for me to have less fear, I choose my contrast consciously. So I'm like, "Okay, if we do get there and that's the situation, then we can handle that. Bodyguards exist for a reason. Privacy hedges exist for a reason. You don't have to be everywhere all at once."

Funny, Kelsey. It's okay. So it's like, you know, just reassuring the part of you that's scared or spiraling or crashing out over the idea of actually getting what you want, because that can help you, like, dissolve a lot of resistance in the moment. Um, but yeah, I think you said it when you were sharing your example of self-sabotage. I feel like we sneakily, especially as women, we just are like, "Oh, I'm too busy" or "I have to be a mom, and I have to be this, and I have to be that, and I have to be that." And we kind of, like, give ourselves to everyone and everything except our goal. Yeah.

And it's like, okay, you can still be an amazing mother, daughter, sister, friend, wife—everything that we are—because we're so amazing and we're, like, literally everything to everyone. We make the world go around. And you can make time for yourself and the things that matter to you and your needs and your boundaries and your provinces and your dreams. And I think it just has been sucked out of us from culture, from religion, from society that to have dreams and desires is inherently selfish, especially for women. And so it's like getting over that selfish narrative and then owning your desires from there and weaving it into your life in a way that works for you, I think is the way to go.

Christine: Oh, so good. So good. And I love that you touched upon self-love. What are some things that you do for self-love for yourself?

Kelsey: Yeah, so my self-love can be shown to myself through my calendar. So if you look at my calendar, you can see, like, how I map out my weeks and my days to be very in alignment with how I work, how I flow, how my energy is, and it's more than just self-care. It's like setting yourself up for success mentally, physically, emotionally—on the calendar, like in every area of life. And my definition of self-love is to take yourself in as a part of yourself and to just take positive ownership of your wellbeing.

So a lot of people think, "Oh, in order to love myself, I have to like everything about myself. That sounds impossible." Yeah, it probably is. Okay, I don't like everything about myself. No, I've never met any single human on earth who likes every single thing about themselves, okay? Whether it's looks, personality, like, no, that's just not a self-loving expectation. So instead, I say, "Okay, how can we nourish ourselves every day? How can we come back to ourselves often? How can we make ourselves just as important as the people that we love in our lives? Not more important, not better. It's not like, 'Oh, I love myself now and nobody else matters, like, F them.' No. It's you are putting yourself in that pile of people you love versus excluding yourself, which is what most women do."

Christine: Yeah, that's so powerful. I think self-love is so important because so many people, like you just said, put all of their other responsibilities before themselves. And you know the expression of, like, you can't save someone without saving yourself. Like, for example, if an airplane is going down, they always advise you to put the oxygen on yourself first. Why? Because we can't give from an empty cup, and eventually that catches up with us, whether it's burnout, chronic illness, um, you develop an autoimmune disease. I feel like these are all things that can happen as a result of ignoring yourself, your needs, and loving yourself.

I was just recently talking about this on one of my podcast episodes. I don't know if you've ever heard of, like, the rice experiment. So you take white rice and you put it in two different containers with some water, and in one, towards one you speak nothing but, like, loving kind words, right? And then towards the other, you talk very, like, negatively, like, "You're ugly. I don't like you." And you will literally see that our words, the energy that we're putting behind the words, will change, will affect the rice.

So the rice that you speak lovely to will stay fine, but the rice that you talk nastily to will actually, like, the water will turn brown, and it will get, like, mucky looking. And so that's just such a great, like, scientific visualization of how, yeah, talking to ourselves and how we, like, get in our heads also with how we talk to ourselves. Like, I love when people, like, do mirror exercises or mirror practice or, like, again, just get the coffee you want, right? Like, give yourself permission to do the things that light you up, that make you feel good, and don't nitpick yourself. Like, just enjoy who you are, the body you've been put in, and you can always work on things. You can change things, right? But just love and accept who you are, because I do think that we are all here for a reason and a purpose, and we're probably in these bodies for a reason and a purpose.

Kelsey: Yeah, no, it's so true, and that brings me to a point of, like, for people who are like, "Well, yeah, it sounds nice to, like, love and accept myself," but how? I would say the vehicle is curiosity, which will lead you to understanding. So if you can become more curious about yourself, like, "Hmm, I wonder why I have this big nose that all my ancestors have. Oh, it's because we're from this region where you had to have a big nose so you could breathe and survive," right?

It's like, then you can come to understand and appreciate. For example, I used to struggle so much with anxiety, and I hated that I was so anxious, and I hated my anxious part and I'd be like, "Ugh, why are you always ruining my life," right? But then one day, and I teach this process in my book, The Manifesting Fix, I just had a little conversation with her, and I was like, "Girl, why are we being anxious all the time? Like, what are we doing here?" And she was like, "Well, I'm the part of you that worries in your mind so you don't have to worry in real life. Like, I anticipate threats, and what I want for you is to be relaxed because I got this, because I'm worrying on your behalf."

And I was like, "Okay, that's a very interesting self-appointed job you gave yourself. Also, I kind of love that you're so loyal to me and that you care about me so much." Like, do I love your approach? No. Do I understand now why you're doing it and where you're coming from? Yeah. So now I can love my anxiety. I've integrated her as a part of myself. I don't banish her. I don't yell at her. And when she comes into my head acting all crazy, as she still does from time to time, I'll just be like, "Anxiety, thank you so much for caring about me. You're my most loyal friend. Even though you're a little crazy, even though you're a little bit annoying, like, I still love you," in the same way that you can love your annoying siblings or your kids when they're being annoying or your pet when it's being annoying. Like, you don't have to like everything about yourself in order to love.

Back to that message: so basically, I just want to leave the people with, like, you deserve the love that you so freely give to everyone else, and it's only going to make your life better, and it's only going to make you better at loving other people. Because I think people think, "If I love myself more, I'll become a narcissist. It'll take away love from other people." No. You fill your cup, and you're so nourished and so vibrant and so aligned that you bless everybody on the planet, literally. And the rice experiment, I mean, just goes to show, like, your body is the same. We're eighty percent water or more, and water is extremely impressionable from your thoughts, from your intentions. So knowing that, you know, speak blessings onto your body and see what happens.

Christine: Exactly. One hundred percent. I think that is so important that people retrain ourselves to talk kindly to ourselves, because I also think that more or less it's women, right? Women are so, so hard on themselves. Like, I never hear like guys are like, "Ugh, my hair looks like crap today," you know what I mean? Right. Or, you know, they're just like, they just go on with their selves, and that's fine. But as a society, I feel like women, we put so much pressure on ourselves. And you're right, like the more that we love ourselves, the more that it helps everybody, because positivity spreads positivity, and that good energy. It's all about energy, and we know that. And the more people that become aware of that, the bigger the difference it will make as we continue to grow and evolve as, like, a society, as a collective, as... I think, again, like I keep going back to, like, this is an era where people are rising in enlightenment, in awareness, in being brave enough to share, like we're doing, like the insights and the downloads and the journey of going from having a thought and a desire and a belief to making it happen, and seeing where it's going to lead you. And being excited.

I'm so excited for you, because I am feeling the energy from you of, like, this is going to be big for you. This is going to be an unlock. And like being okay with that, right? So you have a little bit of a runway to get your nervous system, if it's, if anxiety is showing up and saying, "Hey, I'm here," yeah. And you're like, "No, no, no. Go sit down. Take a seat. I love you. I bless you, but not today," yeah? Um, you know what I mean? Like, all in divine timing, and it's going to work out amazingly and perfect. And I do really love, I want to share, like I went to an event recently. I went to see Mel Robbins, and I, I walked out with my husband and I was like, "I can see myself on stage. Like, I can see myself doing that." And I said, "But the part that I wouldn't like is, like, where would the lines of like privacy and..." Yeah. Do you know what I mean?

I'm like, some people, yeah, like they become this big deal, and it's like, sometimes you just want to be like yourself. Like, you want to just drink a coffee at Starbucks and go for a run without being bothered. And now I get it. Like, now it's like, okay, I can, I can see why, like, people might resist, right? There's that resistance. Yeah. Because you don't always want to be on. Like, we need to recharge, especially, like, people that tap in and are intuitive and have these gifts. Like, we need to recharge. Like, and sometimes people are too people-y, and we need a break, you know?

Mm-hmm. Um, but that's the beauty and the blessing of having gifts and having a message and having desires to share with the world and be open and beautiful and delicate and put it all out there. It's very vulnerable, but it's also so admirable. So I love that ability to do that.

Kelsey: Thank you. Yeah, it's definitely vulnerable. And with this book, The Manifesting Fix, like, it's the first book that I've written where I share personal stories, because the other books were more like guidebooks, more informational, and this one is a totally different tone, totally, like, girlfriend-to-girlfriend over coffee. Like, let me tell you what worked. Let me tell you what didn't work. Let me tell you why. And so I'm like, dang, like, people are going to know about my life, you know? That's kind of crazy.

But for me, when I get freaked out about it, I'm like, it's for the mission. And not to be, like, a martyr for the mission, but it's like a get over yourself, Kelsey. If you want to spread the medicine, like, this is how we're spreading the medicine. Yeah. Ego aside, right? So...

Christine: Yeah.

Kelsey: Yeah. And, like, people who are, you know, scared to start that business or scared to do that podcast, like, remember that everything that you want to manifest is a co-creation. So for me, this book is not just my desire. It's the desire of everyone who's going to read it and benefit from it for it to exist. Mm, right? Yeah. And that coffee shop that you want to start, like, the whole work-from-home community in your neighborhood is like, "Oh, we wish we had a cool, vibey place to get out of our house and work from." Or the restaurant you want to open or, you know, if you want to be a doctor, there's patients who want to be your patients. So it's like it's always a two-sided thing.

And what I like to tell people as a little reframe is, like, people think it's selfish to go for your desires. I think it's selfish to withhold your desires from the world. Yes. Because then you're not bringing forth your gifts and your talents and things that other people can benefit from. So...

Christine: I can definitely echo off of that message, because someone once recently said to me, like, "Why are you holding your gifts back from the people that are waiting for them?"

Kelsey: Yeah, exactly.

Christine: And I was like, "Oof, you're right. This is more than me. This is more than about me."

Kelsey: Yeah, and even if you're like, "I want generational wealth," like, don't you think the generations after you want you to figure that out? Yeah, yeah, exactly.

Christine: I literally... I'm telling you, so many things that you're saying, I'm making, like, these connections in my brain. Like, I literally just thought that before we got on call. I'm like, "This is not about me." I'm like, "This is about my past ancestors and my future generations. I'm like, I am on a mission right now to clear XYZ or to do XYZ, and it's not just about me. Like, I raised my hand, then I'm like, 'All right, me, I'll do it,' you know? And now I'm like, here doing it, I'm like, 'Dang, what did I sign up for?' You know?"

Kelsey: Yes, yes.

Christine: But this is just confirmation that we are on the right track, because, again, here we are—aligned and abundant, aligned and abundant times two, right? That's right. And I am definitely going to recommend everyone follow you on Substack, pre-order your book, get on socials, follow you on Instagram. So remind my listeners all the deets. Where can we find you? Where can we have these, like, fun, casual interactions with you, just like the two girlfriends that we are right now? And I love everything about your energy and your vibe, and I'm so glad that we met, so it's just such a beautiful thing. So tell me, tell the listeners where we can find you.

Kelsey: Yeah, so people can find me on kelseyaida.com, the High Vibin' It Podcast, of course. It's High Vibin' with no G because we're too cool for a G. Yeah. So High Vibin' It, three words. And The Manifesting Fix, like you said, is available for presale, so definitely order that. I'm coming out really soon with some pre-order bonuses. So you can forward me your receipt, and then you'll get sent, like, all these cool bonuses that'll keep you busy until the book comes. If you just search The Manifesting Fix online, Kelsey Aida, you'll see all the links where you can purchase it from everywhere. My Substack, of course. I'm sure you'll give them the link to that, but if you search Kelsey Aida on Substack, you can find me there. And yeah, Instagram, TikTok—I'm just Kelsey Aida everywhere, here to help you manifest your best life and love yourself through the process.

So I would just encourage people to use me as a resource, because I've put out so much good content over the years. So yeah.

Christine: I love that, and I will absolutely put all of the links in the show notes, and you can easily find them right there. And I encourage everybody to follow along on Kelsey's journey, because I am so excited to see where this leads you. 

Kelsey: Thank you.